Not getting any responses? Here's some tips....

By nux (FF Host)
Dating Profile - Photos - Blog Home

Updated 28 Aug, 19 - 24 Comments.

G'day,

I guess this blog is more directed to the Men on the site, because lets face it, you women get loads more interest than Men on dating sites. That's not intended to offend, it's just a statistical fact. With that in mind, i thought i'd post some tips for the guys to help improve their chances here on FlingFinder.

Now, i don't proclaim to be any sort of casanova, or be an expert with the ladies, but i have been on this site since soon after it launched back in 2007, and in that time i've observed a lot, read a lot of blogs, and been an active member of the community here - so i've learned a lot. These tips will not guarantee success, but will certainly improve your chances.

1) Most women want a personalized message. Send hundreds of messages. Online dating is a numbers game. The more messages you send, the better your chances. Premium membership lets you send unlimited messages, so take advantage of it.

2) When sending a message, don't send a one liner like "Hi, how are you" or "Hey, i'd like to meet up". Try to engage in a conversation, read the Womans profile, and ask them something relating to it. For example, if they mention they like horses, maybe ask "Do you own your own horses? Do you live on a farm? What kind of horses?" Asking questions will encourage a response. Ask them about the area they live in. Ask them about their favourite movie or TV show - anything to encourage a response.

3) Fill in your profile. Don't be lazy, if your profile just says "Looking for fun, must be NSA etc, etc" and tells the ladies nothing about yourself, other than what YOU want, they are less likely to be interested. You should make yourself stand out, tell the ladies about yourself. What do you do for work? What do you like to do in your spare time? What do you look like?

4) Add a photo to your profile. You can make it private if you wish to be discreet, but to be completely honest most women will want to see a photo before they reply, it sounds shallow, but research shows that's just the way it is. Don't make your main photo a nude. If you wish to post nude photos, put them in your private album and only invite the person to view them after a bit of conversation, unless they ask before hand.

5) Don't be too quick to "get to the point" - even though the name of the site is "FlingFinder", don't make the mistake of thinking that's all it is, it's much more than that, read the tagline - "Dating, Love, Flings, Fun!". Most women still like to be wooed, and not everyone is here for the same thing.

6) Use the chatroom! If there's not many people in chat, message some people and ask them to join you for a chat. But remember to use some tact, and be respectful. Don't click on a Womans cam without attempting a conversation first, and asking permission to view - most women hate that. Also, hold off on asking them to expose themselves to you, you wouldn't ask a Woman in a pub to do that, this is no different. After getting to know eachother for a while, then i'm sure that topic will come up - it is an adult site after all.

7) Lastly, don't whinge about not getting any responses! There have been blogs from guys complaining about that in the past and it really seems to stir up a negative reaction. You'll be shooting yourself in the foot.

Remember, success will take some effort. If you don't put any effort in, you'll decrease your chances of finding a potential match. It's all about improving your chances.